Kelly Payne


I am a Certified Relationship Coach in Training at the World Coaching Institute (WCI), a Coaching School credentialed by the International Coach Federation (ICF), the leading organization providing standards and certification for the Coaching industry. I have completed my coursework and am currently logging my final coaching hours toward certification. I also have a B.A. in Psychology from the University of Washington.

My Background

I’ve been determined since childhood to understand the mysteries of consciousness, the human heart, and what gives our lives meaning. The pathways that I’ve found most rewarding in these pursuits include mindfulness, positive and developmental psychology, sociobiology, including the evolution of behavior and the brain, attachment theory, cognitive behavioral therapy, non-violent communication, and relationship science.

Being a member of the alternative lifestyle and LGBTQIA+ communtiies has given me the passion and experience to support others who face particular difficulties navigating loving relationships in the context of societal pressure and oppression.

My partners and loved ones with ADD, ADHD and Autism have also inspired me to learn more to support Neurodivergent people and those relationships in where at least one partner is Neurodivergent.

The most recent turning point in my journey was when my husband and partner of 25 years passed away unexpectedly at the end of 2016. Reeling with grief and confusion about which direction to take for my drastically altered future, I chose to hike the Pacific Crest Trail from Mexico to Canada in 2018, literally giving me a path to walk and a direction to go. The unparalleled open-heartedness and support of other hikers and community embracing us on trail helped me process my grief and find my way forward in life. I realized that at my core, I want to pursue a path dedicated to helping others. I was drawn to Relationship Coaching for it’s focus on empowerment and rapid progress, helping clients have the deeply connected, fulfilling relationships crucial to their health and development.

My Goals

I believe that we all can find the love we seek when we learn and practice effective ways of connecting with ourselves and with others. I will support you on the journey of unearthing your core values, helping you to create a vision for your ideal life that guides you to identify and take the actions you need that will lead you to healthy, thriving relationships.

My practice is affirming of Polyamory and other forms of Consensual Non-Monogamy such as Open Relationships, Swingers and Sex-Positivity, LGBTQIA+ folx, members of the Kink community, and Neurodivergent people. I welcome and support people of all orientations, lifestyles, cultural backgrounds and identities into my practice. I feel that much of the existing advice and care pathologizes Neurodivergent partners in relationships, and so strive to empower each partner in discovering and fostering strategies for clear, respectful communication and getting everyone’s needs met.

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